// Keepers//

1) He puts you first. You. Not work, not his friends, YOU.

2) He puts your relationship first.

3) He thinks about the future — and you’re in it.

4) You don’t have to guess if he’s going to show up for a date — you know he will, because you can count on him.

5) Those goofy quirks you have that other people (including you!) find annoying? He finds them endearing.

6) He’s willing to compromise in an argument. It’s not about ego or who’s actually right — it’s about finding a solution that works best for you. BOTH of you.

7) He does those small things for you that make your life that much sweeter, because he knows it makes you happy.

8) Your happiness matters to him.

9) He supports your dreams and ambitions and encourages you to keep going when you’re ready to quit.

10) He’s there for you. Whether it’s a good day or terrible, awful day, he’s there for you.

11) He knows you have value — and isn’t afraid to say so.

12) He cares about some — but not all — of your hobbies, but supports all of them. Why? Because they make you happy.

13) He remembers those little things you tell him: how Aunt Bea loves the color blue and you collect sea glass.

14) He knows when to shut his mouth and be tactful. If you ask him a leading question (does my butt look fat in these?), he’ll give you a tactful answer rather than the truth.

15) He’s respectful of you, your boundaries, your needs and desires. He respects YOU.

16) He accepts you for you — the real you.

17) He doesn’t take life too seriously. Life isn’t all work and no play — and your partner should feel the same way.

18) He takes the time he needs for himself, while making sure you never feel excluded from something.

19) He cares about other people, even if he’s not always talking about it.

20) He never makes a promise he can’t (or doesn’t plan to) keep.

// 當女人不再…//

當女人不再跟你吵架時，她已經不愛你了。

當女人不再對你嘮叨時，她已經對你死心了。

當女人不再對你流淚時，她已經對你心寒了。

當女人不再對你撒嬌時，她已經對你没熱情了。

當女人不再深夜催你回家時，她已經對你失望了。

當女人深夜不再等你時，她已經對你放棄了。

當女人不再向你解釋她的行為和想法時，她已經對你厭煩了。

當女人不再與你談及任何生活、工作的話題時她正在遠離你了。

當女人不再與你分享她的快樂時，她已經對你漠然了。

當女人不再與你分擔煩惱和麻煩時，她已經不信任你了。

當女人做任何決定都獨立處理時，她已經不需要你了。

當女人對你的沾粘自喜一笑而過的時候，她已經看透你了。

當女人在你身邊，一直的沉默、沉默，繼續沉默。

請你相信，她已經毫無留戀的要離開你了。

男人看完後，請別讓你身邊的女人變成如此，而成了遺憾….

// Sad But Loving Story//

“When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I’ve got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.

Suddenly I didn’t know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly. She didn’t seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why?

I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn’t talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Jane. I didn’t love her anymore. I just pitied her!

With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company. She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Jane so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.

The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn’t have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Jane. When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again.

In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn’t want anything from me, but needed a month’s notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month’s time and she didn’t want to disrupt him with our broken marriage.

This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day. She requested that every day for the month’s duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.

I told Jane about my wife’s divorce conditions. . She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully.

My wife and I hadn’t had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mommy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don’t tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office.

On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn’t looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her.

On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me. On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn’t tell Jane about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.

She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily.

Suddenly it hit me… she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head.

Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it’s time to carry mom out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.

But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn’t noticed that our life lacked intimacy. I drove to office…. jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind…I walked upstairs. Jane opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Jane, I do not want the divorce anymore.

She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Jane, I said, I won’t divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn’t value the details of our lives, not because we didn’t love each other anymore. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart. Jane seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away. At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I’ll carry you out every morning until death do us apart.

That evening I arrived home, flowers in my hands, a smile on my face, I run up stairs, only to find my wife in the bed -dead. My wife had been fighting CANCER for months and I was so busy with Jane to even notice. She knew that she would die soon and she wanted to save me from the whatever negative reaction from our son, in case we push through with the divorce.— At least, in the eyes of our son—- I’m a loving husband….

The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the bank. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves.

So find time to be your spouse’s friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage!

If you don’t share this, nothing will happen to you.

If you do, you just might save a marriage. Many of life’s failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up
—

// Surviving//

Tonight is the most difficult night to pass.

I know that if i can survive tonight, tomorrow night wont be as difficult, and the night after that will be even better.

How?

i don’t know, just bite the bullet i guess…

// Serious Men//

How can you tell if a guy is serious about you? Most men aren’t as hard to read as you may think. There are surefire ways to tell that he sees you in his future. Here are our seven favorites:

1. He remembers a thing that you mentioned you like and buys it as a just-because gift.

2. He goes to big family events with you, including reunions… and funerals.

3. He cares about your career and wants to help you get ahead.

4. He wears everything you buy him.

5. He plans vacations with you.

6. He makes plans for the future that involve you.

7. He takes you out with surprises.

8. He calls and texts you every day. He apologizes when he doesn’t call back for a while (but doesn’t do this often).

9. Well connected with the people you are close with.

10. He offers to help.

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